Oops.

When you're writing a letter to the police to refute claims of illegal drug use in your nightclub, it's probably best to use the stationery that's not covered in cocaine.

Speaking of being fruitful and multiplying...

I've been disturbed recently by what I perceive as radical antifeminist undercurrents in our culture. Antifeminist books like "The Surrendered Wife" are gaining a toehold in the collective consciousness, and reality shows featuring human overbreeding set against put-upon breadwinning husbands and housewife drudges are becoming increasingly popular. Take for instance, "Jon and Kate Plus 8," "18 Kids and Counting," and "Kids by the Dozen." The freak show aspect of these programs is undeniable. Kate presents us with a frank discussion of the revoltingly expansive slack pouch of her formerly overpregnant stomach (now tightened up with donated plastic surgery, thank you very much).

Watching the parents on these shows marshalling their kindermobs through simple tasks from breakfast to bathing to park outings provokes a blend of pity, awe and horror in me, not unlike what I feel when confronted with terrible congenital physical abnormalities.

Sideshow aspect aside, what these families often don't mention is that most of them are radical fundamentalist Christians who believe they are acceding to god's will by whelping litters of children. One of the moms on "Kids by the Dozen" referred to a gift of hand-me-down clothes as a token of appreciation from god for obeying him and raising so many of his warriors. That's right - his "warriors."

Radical fundamentalist Christians belonging to the "Quiverful" movement believe that Christian couples should engage in no family planning whatsoever, but should instead submit themselves to having as many children as god sees fit. Among the reasons for this is the notion that the more Christians they can raise, the more they can put into positions of power, where they can shape the policies that effect the lives of everyone in this country. In other words, they want a theocracy, and they will create as many new radicals as they can in the effort.

So before you dismiss these superbreeders with a self satisfied chuckle and change the channel, consider the fact that they think they're raising cultural warriors, and the people they're raised to fight against may be you.

http://www.newsweek.com/id/189763?from=rss

Luxury Bargains: Tasting Menus Part I

With the economy in the crapper, Los Angeles restaurants are coming up with new, creative ways to draw customers. One of these is the value priced tasting menu. Some of the best restaurants in town are coming up with tantalizing tasting menus at very reasonable prices. First up, AMMO.

AMMO's "Simple Supper" tasting menu is $30 and includes your choice of soup or salad plus entree (pasta, salmon or chicken) and a build-your-own sundae with the very highly regarded house made ice cream.

http://www.ammocafe.com/
1155 N Highland AveLos Angeles, CA 90038
(323) 871-2666

Nicely done, your holiness.

From the outrage files: Pope Benedict XVI has finally figured out what's hampering us in our efforts to eradicate AIDS in Africa. It's the distribution of condoms. That's right: promoting safe sex is contributing to the spread of AIDS.

Many devoutly religious people seem to take the view that if we don't talk about sex, or better yet, if we portray it as dirty and shameful, people will stop doing it. But the cold fact is that abstinence only methods do not work. People who make purity pledges get knocked up at about the same rate as their impure colleagues. God has commanded us to be fruitful and multiply, and damned if we aren't good at it.

It's one thing to object to the distribution of condoms in suburban American schools, but it's quite another to object to it in places where people are dying in droves every day from AIDS. In fact, I think the spread of religion has been more detrimental to the AIDS eradication effort than the spread of condoms. Specifically, I'd like to call out religious medical missions that will help you once you have AIDS, but will not provide you with the education or tools necessary to avoid getting AIDS in the first place.

It's bad enough not to give people the means to avoid dying of a horrible disease, but to criticize those who are providing that service is beyond comprehension.

America may have the greatest amount of white trash...

...but England's white trash is definitely the trashiest.

Former Project Runway contestant jailed for assault.

Guess who.
Guess how gleeful I am.

The Daily Lalee might get slightly less daily...

In addition to my day job, I've just accepted a night job at a local state university, so my time is going to get tighter and tighter as I have to work on lesson plans, grade papers, etc. I hope you'll be patient with me! I will continue to post material as often as I can.

Losing weight - with Jesus!

I was once told by a Mormon man that there's a serious problem in their church with obesity in women, especially older, unmarried women.  Part of the problem arises from the intense emphasis the church places on marriage.  In a Mormon wedding, the covenant doesn't last "til death do you part," but "for time and eternity."  I don't think it's going too far to say that devout Mormon women grow up believing that the sole purpose of their life on this earth is to get married in a temple wedding and raise a family.  Compound this with the fact that, as in most religions, there are more devout Mormon women than devout Mormon men and you've got a problem.  There's a population of older, unmarried Mormon women who feel like they've essentially failed at their life's purpose.

These older single ladies can't have extramarital sex, can't smoke, can't drink, can't indulge in recreational drug use (although the rate of prescription anti-depressant use in Utah is among the highest in the nation), but they can indulge in food, and they often do.  Mormon culture is permeated by good cooks and good food, especially sweets.  It places an emphasis on clean living, but it also places an emphasis on baking.  I think this concept is captured by a speech I once witnessed at a Mormon rehearsal dinner.  One of the female family members gave the young couple a Kitchenaid mixer and explained how "a mixer is a fixer" for all the problems of the family, then basically went on to explain how each problem could be solved by the appropriate food.  Kid comes home from school upset?  Bake cookies.  Husband stressed out?  Bake a pie.

I was also raised in the "food is love" tradition, so I get it.  I believe nourishing yourself, occasionally indulging yourself, and most importantly, forgiving yourself for that indulgence, is an essential aspect of self love.  I get how a depressed woman who felt like she'd missed out on the most fulfilling part of life would turn to seven layer bars and rocky road brownies.  But without moderation, and without the self-forgiveness, I can see how you'd have a massive backlog of toxic guilt.  And it's not just the Mormon church.  Extrapolate this trend out to any religious organization that emphasizes marriage and restricts pleasure and you've got a lot of sad fat single people.

How do you reach these people?  Do you tell them that being thin and healthy is a pleasure in and of itself that they deserve to enjoy?  Nope.  You tell them they need to get thin for Jesus.  Programs like Weigh Down, Thin for Him and What Would Jesus Eat are tailored especially for this population.  And evidence suggests that they're actually more successful than secular weight loss programs.  Is this because of the built-in support group?  Is it the intense guilt and shame factor?  Who knows?  Hopefully it will help these people to develop reasons to love and value themselves, outside of and in addition to the love god and Jesus have for them.

Things I Lurve: Veronica M

Whenever I need a new dress for a special event, a hot date, or just to spoil myself, I generally pop over to Veronica M. Most of their designs are in heavy, wrinkle resistant fabrics that travel really well. I've literally crammed a Veronica M dress in the bottom of a backpack and pulled it out a day later, completely wearable. Veronica M's fabrics also drape beautifully and her designs work really well on curvy women. I find her taste in prints to be hit-and-miss, but she knocks it out of the park often enough to keep me coming back. Best of all, prices are generally reasonable. Non-sale items don't run much higher than $100, and I recently picked up an adorable shift dress from the sale rack for $5, which garnered numerous compliments during my fabulous New York weekend.

Veronica M
7122 Beverly Blvd.
and
8512 W. 3rd Street
and
410 Broadway in Santa Monica
and
30 W. Colorado Blvd. in Pasadena
and
13019 Ventura Blvd. in Studio City

A fun little diversion. And you just might learn something.

If you haven't checked out The Straight Dope, you absolutely should.  Columnist Cecil Adams answers questions from the incisive to the asinine.  Some examples:

What's going on when your ears pop?

Why aren't porn actors charged with prostitution?

How would the U.S. military fight a zombie army?

Coulp sheep replace the lawn mower?

Where do bugs go when it starts to rain?

Alexander McQueen

Every once in a while, I see something so beautiful and so bizarre that I'm completely at a loss for words. Alexander McQueen's fall collection did that to me this year, which is why it's taken me days to figure out how to do this post. To me, McQueen's collection is an exquisite commentary on the melding of decadence and decay that has permeated world culture for decades, with the decay finally roiling its way to the surface. In McQueen's collection, you see looks that are exquisite from afar, but leave you with the distinct impression that something is wrong. It's not just the overblown, harshly drawn mouth on the model - when you look up close, you see that her hat is made of aluminum cans or bubble wrap. You see that her face is swathed in plastic wrap. You see that this fantasically beautiful look contains an element that is disturbing and revolting. Most of the collection had this visceral impact on me, and I wish I could show you every single look.

Of course, maybe I'm taking it way too seriously and it's just meant to be a giant spectacle or bratty joke, but for me this was a case of art and historical circumstances melding in a way that left me thinking about it for days.

Wonderful Women: Sophie Scholl

Sophie Scholl is one of those people whose lives should be taught in every school in every nation. But it's surprising to learn just how few people have heard of her.

Scholl was born in 1921 in a small German town, the fourth of five children. In 1942, she enrolled at the University of Munich, studying biology and philosophy. Around that time, a group of young men at the university, including Scholl's brother Hans, formed a Nazi resistance group called The White Rose.

Several members of The White Rose had spent time fighting on the eastern front and had witnessed Nazi atrocities firsthand. They authored political leaflets describing the horrible war crimes of the Nazis and instructing Germans to passively resist them. Although Sophie did not author any of the leaflets, she did help distribute them, and it was while she was distributing them on campus that she was arrested on February 18, 1943. Three days later, Sophie, Hans, and their friend Cristoph Probst were tried for treason, convicted, and sentenced to death in a ridiculous parody of a trial, wanly defended by court appointed attorneys. They were beheaded just hours after their sentences were handed down. Impressed by their dignity and bravery, the guards of the prison violated regulations by letting the three friends see each other before they died. Hans and Sophie were allowed to see their parents, but none of Probst's family was aware that he had even been arrested, and his wife was in the hospital giving birth to their third child.

Sophie Scholl's last words were: "How can we expect righteousness to prevail when there is hardly anyone willing to give himself up individually to a righteous cause? Such a fine, sunny day, and I have to go, but what does my death matter, if through us thousands of people are awakened and stirred to action?"

Sadly, the democratic uprising that Sophie envisioned never took place, and several more members of The White Rose were executed or sent to concentration camps.

A quality little film about Sophie Scholl was nominated for best foreign language film a few years ago - it's called Sophie Scholl: The Final Days, and it's worth adding to your Netflix queue. Another film about Scholl featuring Christina Ricci has been in development purgatory for years and looks like it's finally gone off the rails.

Dear Cardinal Levanda,

You believe in virgin birth and resurrection from the dead.
You believe a rambling, violent book that promotes sexism, racism, homophobia, slavery and profound injustice, and was written by desert tribesmen thousands of years ago, is the word of god.
You believe a capricious puppetmaster policeman in the sky personally supervises your every action and listens to your every prayer, despite the fact that if such a person actually existed, he would probably have better things to do.
You traipse around wearing man dresses and silly party hats.
And you think atheists are absurd?

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/29484902/?543

Furthermore, I don't think most atheists would go so far as to say that evolution proves there is no god. It simply proves that the god you would have us believe in, a god who lovingly crafted every single animal from scratch and loaded them two by two onto a giant boat, does not exist. But go ahead and say whatever gets you headlines. Obfuscation, after all, has always been your lifeblood.

Lurve,

Lalee

Ever notice...

Ever notice how Disney heroines look like underwear models:

But are a little too substantial for the runway, if you take my meaning?

While Disney villainesses look like they just finished walking for Viktor and Rolf:

Except of course for these two dames, who are too fat even for catalog work:

I know we want our heroines to be pretty. Of course we do. Everybody likes to look at pretty people. But I don't think the appeal of Disney princesses is just about beauty - it's also about sexual availability. I mean, some of those girls are pretty tramped out, I gotta say. It would be a cold day in hell before I'd let my pre-teen out the door in what Jasmine, Ariel, and Pocahontas are wearing. Don't even get me started on Esmeralda's stripper pole routine. Clearly it's not just about beauty. The Evil Queen, Maleficent, and even Cruella are arguably beautiful according to runway standards. And at least they manage to keep everything covered, for god's sake.

This is especially interesting when contrasted with Disney villains, who tend to be Lagerfeldian in their emaciated physique and effete bearing.

It's been posited many times that Disney villains are "drawn gay." But when you look at male and female villains as a group, I don't think it's about homosexuality as much as it's about defying gender expectations and failing to be sexually attractive. The villains and villainesses aren't gay - they're desexualized. They're androgenous. I don't think the message is that homosexuality is bad, but rather that failing to conform to traditional gender stereotypes, and specifically failing to be sexy, is bad. It's important to be beautiful, but if you're female, it's even more important to be feminine, fertile, and sexually available.

Forget the effects of third wave feminism and the porn industry - it's Disney that's shaping the imaginations of vulnerable American girls and creating generations of aspiring tarts.

This is what we did in New York this weekend:

Modern Art.

Post Modern Art.

Post Post Modern Art.

Art of the Moment.

Art of Tomorrow.

Performance Art. (Including a young man having a line tattooed down the center of his head live and in person.)

Dinner and drinks at an underground bar with a mechanical bull.

Meandering around Midtown.

Partying with diplomats at the Suiss Institute, eating tiny cunning hors d'oeuvres shaped like itty bitty gift boxes with chive ribbons.

Partying with French people in a fabulous SoHo apartment.

Ordering room service at incredibly unreasonable hours.

Brunch at Petrossian.

Drinks at a marvelous 5th Avenue apartment.

More drinks plus dinner at Waverly Inn - mac & cheese blanketed with black truffle shavings!

Williamsblur.

Being dazzled by the beauty of New York at night as seen from the Williamsburg bridge.

It's a tiny pink baby dolphin!

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1158494/Caught-camera-Is-worlds-PINK-dolphin.html

Seriously! Tiny! Pink! Baby! Dolphin!

I know what my niece is getting for her fourth birthday.

http://www.armorofgodpjs.com/

Just kidding, Emilee. I would never do that to you.

Love,

Aunt Wally

Beyonce Knowles: A Fashion Retrospective

Dear Beyoncé,

You're a lovely girl. You can pull it together. I've seen you do it.

Cavalli

Vintage Atelier Versace

But sometimes you make bad choices.

Les Habitudes

Versace

We all make mistakes. It's not wrong to make mistakes. But it does make us look foolish when we repeat the same mistake over and over again, don't you find?

House of Dereon

House of Dereon

House of Dereon

House of Dereon

House of Dereon

House of Dereon

I know you love your mother, dear, but what I'm about to say is for your own good: stop letting her at you. Cut the braided gold lamé cord. Take away her glue gun before it's too late.

Love,

Lalee