Vadge Hating Ads

Here's a funny article summarizing the top 10 most misogynist TV spots of all time. I think my favorite is the ad for the playhouse complete with washer and dryer, with a little girl singing, "Taking care of my home is a dream, dream, dream," in the background. Just you wait, missy.

An odd little situation.

Have you ever received a friend suggestion on Facebook? You know, "Joe Bob thinks you should be friends with so-and-so," that sort of thing? Well I just received a suggestion that I befriend a girl I knew in high school who was absolutely horrible to me. She was part of my social group, but constantly sniped about me behind my back, stole money from me, and eventually engaged in a public showdown where she told me how awful I was and that no one wanted to be friends with me anymore. Ladies, if you have ever been bullied by another girl, you are probably familiar with this barbaric schoolyard ritual. It's less obvious than a fist fight, but the consequences can be deeper and longer lasting. Case in point: the fact that I'm blogging about one over 13 years after it happened.

Part of me wants to befriend her out of curiosity, just so I can confirm that her life is nowhere near as fabulous as mine. Part of me wants to ignore the suggestion and never think about her again as long as I live. Readers, what would you do?

Fascinating Womanhood

In 1963, Helen Andelin wrote a book called Fascinating Womanhood, which captured the tenor of the anti-feminist backlash. Anti-feminist texts, such as Fascinating Womanhood, The Surrendered Wife, and Created to Be His Helpmeet, are pretty much what you'd expect them to be. They promote traditional gender roles and divisions of labor, and generally abhor the idea of a woman taking a leadership role in her relationships. The general message is "be delightful and compliant, and your husband will stop being a dick to you."

Despite the knee-jerk reaction of anger and disgust most people now have toward these books, they do have valuable things to say about what we lost as we moved closer to gender equality. Many, if not most women do want to find a life partner who will cherish, support and protect them, and maybe even open a door or two, and many of these women find themselves emotionally crushed under cultural pressure to be strong, independent women who can be all things at all times. But I think most of us agree that taking responsibility for your own happiness by assuming the burdens of a self-actualized person is infinitely better than retreating into fear, dependence, and submission. Ms. Andelin, of course, would disagree.

To give you a feel for her book, without actually having to read it, here is a selection of terms from the index of Fascinating Womanhood. This list also works as something of a nifty poem.

Adaptable, good follower
Advice, how to give feminine
Anger, how to overcome
Angry, when husband is
Ask for things, how to
Ask, what not to ask for
Ask, when not to ask
Childlike joy
Childlike trust
Confusion of financial roles
Conversation, feminine
Convince, men don't like
Diligent, homemaking
Domestic duties, happiness
Drudgery, accept
Emotional health, by service
Fearfulness, feminine
Feminine arts, skills
Feminine, dependent women
Feminine touches
Foods to avoid
Fundamentals, homemaking
Hands, feminine manner
Happiness in homemaking
Harm in women working
Hints, men don't like
Honor his position
Housekeeping, a matter of character
How to ask for things
How to be perfect follower
How to express admiration
King, treat him like
Laugh, feminine manner
Love whom we serve
Meal preparation
Obedient to husband
Priorities, homemaking
Push and persuasion, not best
Reduce demands
Smile, when not to
Submissiveness, feminine
Suggestions, men don't like
Support his plans, decisions
Sweet submission
Tenderness, feminine
Voice, feminine manner
Walk, feminine manner
Weakness, feminine
Weight control
Youthful appearance
Youthful manner